Free Birthing = WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?

It seems that when I am pregnant I find myself extra drawn to shows about babies, giving birth to babies, being pregnant with babies, babies -babies- babies. I enjoy living vicariously through other women giving birth because I wish I was as well. I love having children, but if I have said it once, I'll say it 890 more times- I am too impatient to be pregnant. Yeah, there should be a process of time, but no more than six months- nine is just completely ridiculous.

Anyway, last night, I was watching a documentary on women who choose free birthing as an option. If you are not familiar with the term, what it entails is the woman giving birth to her child at home without any medical assistance what so ever- no doctors, nurses, not even a mid-wife or Douala. I sat there the whole time with my mouth gaping open. My pants were wet from my mortified drool- either that or I sneezed, coughed or blinked too hard and peed myself.

I am all for doing what makes you comfortable, because giving birth and going through labor is one of the most humbling and ridiculous experiences I have and will ever go through as long as I live. Saying that, I feel that there is a line that one should not cross- the line where your opinions affect the well being of not only your health and safety but the safety and livelihood of your unborn child. These women are playing Russian roulette with their child's life, and it is completely irresponsible. I understand if you had a bad experience at the hospital or you do not like doctors or whatever other reason you have that makes you want to have your child at home, but you should never let those feelings and opinions get in the way of bringing your child safely into this world. I do not agree with home delivery- I believe that hospitals and doctors were created by God for a reason and I do not want to be anywhere else if an emergency occurs while I am giving birth. However, if you choose to give birth at home, than you at least have the responsibility of recruiting a mid-wife or some kind of medical professional who has the know-how to be able to deal with this situation. You should not be tying your child's umbilical cord with a shoestring and cutting it with a pair of scissors you got at Wal-mart- and no, burning the blades over a match does NOT make them adequately sterile. We do not live in 1875 (incase you lost your calendar). If you are more than comfortable using other modern advances such as electricity and plumbing and you live in a house that does not have a dirt floor or is surrounded by stone walls then AT LEAST give your child the best opportunity into this world by being around medical professionals who will be able to deal with labor and birth and all of the crazy situations they bring forth, even if that means giving birth at home.

Month over Twenty-one, not quite Twenty Two

Dear Jack,

I apologize for failing at my posting last month. We did have a lot going on, but I will let you know that it is partly your fault. Yes, yours. We did not have a working laptop for almost two months, because someone decided to place the laptop on the ottoman where a certain someone decided to pound their little hands on the keyboard. I was out grocery shopping, so the certain someone who left the laptop on the ottoman was not I- use deductive reasoning to figure out who it might have been.

When I walked into the apartment, your father was sitting with his head in his hands in front of a laptop with a screen display that was sideways. We restarted it, and to our dismay the computer did not want to function. We could not do anything. We took it to Best Buy to see if they could figure out what was wrong. THANK GOD it was still under warranty, because they determined it needed a new hard drive. That is right, you killed our hard drive in a matter of 6 seconds. I think you may have a future with the CIA.

In other news, we bought our house and moved! I was worried about how you would adjust to the change, because the apartment is the only home you have ever known. To my pleasant surprise, you did not miss a beat and cozied right up to the new joint. You love the extra room- especially the yard. You even have a new friend "DAV-ID" who you call for frequently, whether he is outside or not. The you casually go into his yard, like a little creeper, searching for him. We are trying to teach you boundaries.

Looking back at the last couple of months, I can not believe how much you have developed. You still speak gibberish sometimes, but more often than not you are conveying yourself with words and phrases. Your new favorite phrase is "I'm Hungry". I am so happy you are back to eating now, but could we, maybe, not be hungry at 5am every morning? I have been pushing you off until at least 7, but yesterday you were more than insistent at 630am when you strictly requested sloop loops (fruit loops). Ever since you saw that darn commercial on saturday, that is all you have asked for. When you first started asking for it, we did not have any in the house. I kept trying to tell you that we did not have fruit loops, but you did not believe me. I tried to explain that if we had fruit loops, I would give them to you but we dont so I cant. But, you think food magically creates itself, so your weren't convinced. I knew things were getting a little out of control when you saw a KFC commercial last night and proceeded to ask for chicken.

I can't tell if this new obsession over food is a new phase, or a reaction to having the stomach virus last week. The only thing worse than being sick yourself, is watching you child be sick. I now know why mothers tell their children that they would be sick for them if they could. It would be much easier being sick myself than watching you lay around, lifeless in comparison to your normal self. The only good thing that came out of you being sick was realizing you still need me. It felt so good to hear you call my name at 3am. Since I work, I do not get to spend the time with you that I want to and so when you fall or bump your head and want "daddy", my heart would go to my stomach a little bit each time.

You are growing so fast and constantly changing every single day. I still can't believe you used to be the little 8lb 11oz nugget I gave birth to almost two years ago. I wish I could be with you all day everyday- Mondays are always the saddest for me. I am glad (and a little jealous) that your daddy gets to experience this part of your life right now- everyday. I know it can be exhausting sometimes, and definitley trying on the nerves- but you will never be as young as you were yesterday ever again. I hope he knows how lucky he is.

Love,

Mommy